Sex with Back Problems
There is no quick cure for the aches and pains as we get older, but there are ways to alleviate the pressure that can aggravate the pain and gain some semblance of control by using a few well placed tricks.
Tell your partner what is working for you and what isn’t. Back pain is no reason to be embarrassed.
Tell your partner what is working for you and what isn’t. Back pain is no reason to be embarrassed.
Pain-Free Sex for Back Problems
Back Problems?
Liberate your Spine for Pain-Free Sex
Tools and Tips to help you get pleasure without pain
There is no quick cure for the aches and pains as we get older, but there are ways to alleviate the pressure that can aggravate the pain and gain some semblance of control by using a few well placed tricks.1. Bathe and Massage First
The muscles surrounding the back will work much better without tension. A warm bath and a massage can do wonders for preparing the back for sex. Try using sensual aromatherapy to get in the mood and soothe aching muscles and relieve tension. Products with rose oils can help relax and soothe your body.
2. Communication
Tell your partner what is working for you and what isn’t. Back pain is no reason to be embarrassed. On the flip side, don’t forget to speak up if you are the partner of the person with back pain, and you are feeling your needs are not being met -- now that all of the focus is going on the person with the pain. Experiment with different positions together. Talk about what works and what doesn’t.
3. Don’t make Intercourse the Main Course
Focus on positions that don’t require much movement. Oral sex or mutual masturbation, which requires less participation from the back, can be the goal of the evening instead of intercourse. Spice oral sex up with flavored lube like Durex Cherry. Add to manual stimulation with a variety of temperatures, like ice cubes or heat packs. This can be a great time to enhance your repertoire.
4. Get Some Help
Look for vibrators and dildos that have long arms or are "hands-free."
The hands-free vibes usually strap on. Wireless wearables make it even easier because once it is strapped to your body you don't even have to move around a cord. Try the Wireless Micro-Butterfly.
Long armed vibrator Hitachi Magic Wand is an old favorite give strong vibrations AND can be maneuvered in many positions. Because of the weight and shape of this vibrator, it will stay put wherever you have placed it. The Hitachi will also work placed between partners for couple’s play. Also try the Flex-O-Pleaser.
5. Position Yourself Correctly
First, find positions where you can limit your movements.
Those with Extension type back pain often find that positions that arch the back slightly are preferable. On your back is the preferred position for many men with this type of back pain. A towel in the small of the back works well to well to support the subtle arch for men as his lover straddles him. Many women find that lying on the stomach, supporting their chest with a pillow while he enters her from behind may alleviate the pressure.
Those with flexion type back pain often find positions with a forward bending motion are more comfortable. For women this would be missionary style with legs drawn up to the chest, or doggy style.
When on your back, bend your knees slightly. You might want to put a pillow or towel under your knees to give them support. The missionary position may be out of the question for men with this type of pain, however. Some men find entering his partner from behind, while he leans forward does the trick.
Nested Spoons (lying on your side, one lover in front of the other – stomach to back) can be tolerated by most back pain. Sensual yet still comfortable, the closeness of one tummy against the other’s back can encourage a connected feeling, it gives easy access to breasts and clitoris, and doesn’t cause excess pressure on either lover’s lumbar region.
Different shaped pillows can help you hold sex positions longer. Try wedge shaped or cylindrical pillows.
Another option is a Love Swing. The Love Swing is easy to hook up (on most door frames) and can hold up to 400 lbs. This contraption can ease you into the most awkward of poses.